Online Friends are Real Friends

 

Today a notification came up that it was a friend's birthday. A friend who passed away last year. She was part of a group that I talk with everyday. A few met her in person, but for others, like me, our friendship was completely online.

I grew up in a world without the internet and I first got online in my 2nd year of college. I was a huge geek and didn't have too many real life friends who shared my interests. But all of a sudden I could speak to people all over the world who had similar interests.

It's been 24 years since I first dove headfirst into the internet and things have changed a lot. But some of my best and most enduring friendships are ones I've made online. I'm still friends with a few people from my early days online. 

But my main friend group came about because we had a love for a specific perfume. A friend of mine gave me a sample of Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab at the Michigan Ren Faire in 2004. I loved it and I've never been a perfume person before. But these were (and are) magical. When I looked them up on the internet, I found that they had a forum which I joined.

I don't post on the forum as much as I used to, but I try to check it every few days. There are also several groups on Facebook and one is where I spend a lot of my online time. We talk about everything and the friend we lost told the best stories.

Even though I never met her in person, I loved her. She was my friend and I miss her so much. I love my other friends too. Some I've met in person, some live on the other side of the world, but thanks to the internet we can talk and connect.

So chat with your friends, enjoy their virtual company because you will be sad when they are gone.

The Pandemic Diaries - The Mask Slackers

Months. It's been months since COVID-19 has completely upended our lives. Here in the United States of America, we haven't done a great job of dealing with this pandemic. Ineffective leaders and conspiracy theories seem to be at the root of our being number 1 at cases and deaths in the world.

When everything started going to hell in March, I was hesitant to wear a mask. Scientists thought back then (which seems like a million years ago now) that masks didn't really help. But as they learned more about the disease, science proved that masks can greatly reduce the spread of the virus.

So I got some masks and started wearing them anytime I left the house. I have cloth masks so I can wash them. I even used my glue gun and some crafting wire to add to the mask to make it more snug around my nose. It's not perfect but it definitely keeps my glasses from fogging up less.

I hurt my foot in April and then hurt it worse about three weeks after the original injury. I ended up being off work for over a month because of it so I had a lot of time on my hands. I was reading a lot and I read an article about the parallels of the current pandemic and the Spanish Flu in the early 1900's. One thing that stuck with me was that people who refused to wear masks back then were called "mask slackers".

Ever since then, I've referred to those who refuse to wear a mask as mask slackers. It's such a simple thing to do to protect others, but a lot of people are just so against it. I am a glutton for punishment and I often read the comments on Facebook. The crazy on some of the comments is astounding.

Apparently some people think that masks are going to cause you to collapse because they think carbon dioxide won't be able to escape the mask and thus poison the wearer. Others think that wearing a mask is a sign that you are a sheep and being controlled (by whom, I'm not sure). Others claim they don't work at all so it's pointless to wear them, especially if you are 'healthy'.

All of these arguments have either been proven wrong by science or are just so ludicrous that I want to roll my eyes. Masks aren't perfect, but it does help slow the spread of this disease. Wearing a mask keeps my germs in my mask so it can't spread. Now you still have to wash your hands, resist touching your face, and wash or replace your mask after every use.

But because the mask slackers are selfish and won't mask up for the good of everyone, the virus rages on. I wear a mask for 8 hours during work and yeah, it's hot and annoying. But I don't want my coworkers getting this or my customers. Also my store requires us to wear it, which is something I'm glad of. I just wish they would enforce wearing of masks for the customers.

Anyway, please, please, please wear your mask. I really want it to be safe for my kid to go back to school and for life to return to some form of normalcy where I don't have to have panic attacks about being exposed to the virus before my work shifts. 

The Pandemic Diaries - Dragon Con

Me at Dragon Con 2019

Everything is canceled this year. From school to concerts to conventions. And just today Dragon Con announced that there would be no Dragon Con this year. Now, they did say that there will be some virtual con things going on, but obviously it's just not the same.

I love Dragon Con - I've blogged about it quite a lot over the years, though I didn't ever get around to blogging about last year's con. Maybe I'll do that come Labor Day weekend as a tribute to the best con that isn't happening.

Honestly I'm not surprised by the news that Dragon Con isn't happening. Because of contracts, they just couldn't cancel before now though it has felt like it was inevitable to quite a few people, myself included, that there was no way that it could happen safely.

Ironically, someone started a new group this morning before the announcement for people who were still planning on going despite the pandemic. Even if a quarter of the normal 80,000+ people showed, that would be a heck of a lot of people.

I am a little bummed that we didn't purchase memberships for this year earlier in the year like we normally do. This year has been such a shitshow for me and my family, outside of the pandemic, that we just didn't get around to it. Those of who did they will get a 2020 badge and some sort of swag. And their membership will be rolled to next  year.  They are also issuing refunds to those who would prefer that.

So the coronavirus has taken the best weekend of the year away and it makes me sad. When I go into work, I'll cross off the days I had requested off for Dragon Con. Hopefully the virus can be stopped / handled / something so we can con again next year.

Summer Movies - ET

Image: fanart.tv

One of the things I miss most right now is going to the movies. I've always loved going to see movies on the big screen. I was lucky enough to even work at a movie theater for a while in college. I don't know what the first movie my parents took me to see, but I do have some memories of going to see
ET when I was four years old.

On the surface, it looked like it was going to be a cute kid's movie, but it ended up freaking preschool me out. The beginning was dark and kinda scary for a four year old. Though this is probably the first time that I had even heard of D&D since that's what they we playing at the start of the movie.

The ET character was a little freaky too - though I do have memories have having and loving a plush ET doll. But it was a scene near the end that was scariest for me.

It was the scene where ET and Elliott are in the sterile room. It was partly because Elliott was sick and ET was dying but it was also the visuals of scientists in white, PPE suits. It was just terrifying if you are four.

I've rewatched ET several times, and I remember feeling vaguely anxious watching that part of the movie even when I was older. It had quite an effect on me!

I honestly think I would have loved it if I was a little older. It's all fantasy and science and the alien can be pretty cute too! But not really appropriate for a four year old.

Do you have any movies that scared you as a child?

The Pandemic Diaries - The ER Visit

I've been meaning to blog about this for a while but kept forgetting. But I hope to start blogging more.

On April 19th, I fell off my carport. It wasn't a huge drop but I watched my right foot bend upwards in a way it shouldn't have.

The pain was immediate and very high. My husband and kid had to help me inside and onto bed. I iced it and elavated it, but it was still very painful the next day so I had my husband take me to the ER.

We pulled up to the entrance of the ER and they had a tent set up. They had several people stationed there in full PPE gear. After I told them why I was there, they asked me the standard COVID questions and took my temperature.

I was rolled into the building in a wheelchair and my husband had to stay outside in the car. It was more than a little bizarre because the waiting room was empty.

After waiting only a few minutes in the waiting room, I was rolled back to a room. I didn't have to wait very long before someone came to check me out.

They brought an x-ray machine to my room and got the x-rays done. The doctor was very attentive, coming in to check on me several times.

In the end, it was one of the fastest ER visits I've had. The x-rays showed I just had a sprain though it was a pretty bad one. They gave me prescriptions for pain medicine and a referral to the orthopedist.

I only saw one other patient - they had been moving her in a bed when I was being rolled back to a room.

Though I was anxious about going because of the virus, I'm glad I went. They were very professional and I felt safe. I'm glad they were taking extra precautions. I do have to wonder how different it would be now, nearly two months later.

The Pandemic Diaries - On Being Essential

Me, an essential 

I work at a grocery store in the deli. I serve food and make subs. It's not hard not is it glamorous. But it allowed me to quit a job that was sucking my soul away and I've made a lot of great friends.

But in this time of Covid-19, it's less great. For the most part my job is the same. We are just washing our hands and changing our gloves a ton more. And cleaning as often as we can. 

Today everyone was given papers to put in our cars deeming us "essential". In light of so many people being laid off or just plain losing their jobs, essential might seem great. But it's not.

Every time I go to work, it feels like I'm playing Russian roulette. Chances are if (when?) I get the coronavirus, I'll survive. I do have health issues but none are breathing related. But it sounds horrible to have so I don't want to get it. And I certainly don't want to spread it.

I worry about me, my family, my friends and coworkers. It also worries me how busy we continue to be. Lunch rush today was insane with crowds of people coming to the deli for food. So much for social distancing.

But as a grocery store, we are essential. People need food throughout this so I will continue to go to work and do the best job I can. 

The anxiety about going into work today made me physically sick last night. My pain levels have been much higher. Though I am thankful that, for the most part, our customers have been kind.

If you know someone who is an essential worker, please keep us in your thoughts. Doctors, nurses and other hospital workers are on the front lines, caring for those who are ill. The rest of us are trying to keep people fed and supplied. We are open, we have things and we'll continue on throughout this ordeal.

Dragon Con is Coming - Some Helpful Advice Before the Con!

Dragon Con is about a month away and since I'm in 10+ Dragon Con groups on Facebook, my feed has been all Dragon Con, all the time.

This is my 12th Dragon Con so I'm definitely a veteran congoer. So I thought I'd address some of the topics that keep coming up.

1) Sheraton and Legionnaire's Disease

The big news this year is that the Sheraton, one of Dragon Con's host hotels - the one everyone has to go to at least once because that's where badge pickup is - had confirmed cases of Legionnaire's disease. This is understandably freaking people out - especially people with hotel reservations there and disabled folks, since Sheraton is where Disability Services is usually located. 

I've seen the same news posts shared over a dozen times, and even in the last few days people are posting like it's new. This has been going on for a few weeks - if anyone scrolled in just about any of the Dragon Con groups they'd see a post about it.

Unfortunately all any of us can do is wait and see. Supposedly, they are cleaning it up as we speak and say that it should only be closed until August 11th. Freaking out isn't going to help anyone and posting the same information over and over is annoying.

2) Dragon Con Parade

I love the Dragon Con Parade! It's one of my all-time favorite things to do at Dragon Con. I sadly had to miss marching in the parade last year since I was recovering from kidney stone surgery. I was at the con, just not up to the parade.

Lots of newbies are apparently discovering the parade and wanting to join in. In years past, this was totally possible. Sadly this is no longer the case.

Parade signups opened on February 15th and the parade was completely full a few hours within signups being open. If you didn't make it in, you went on the wait list. Several months ago, the folks in charge closed the wait list because it was so darn long.

Lots of groups will sign up for spots, and if you miss out, finding a group that will work with your costume that has open spots is the only way to go right now. But as we get closer to the con, those groups will be giving their empty spots back to the parade officials so they can try to get more people off the wait list.

When I realized that I couldn't march last year, I made sure to let the head of the parade know so she could give someone my spot. 

But if you are new to Dragon Con, I highly recommend that you watch the parade at least once. I think it gives you a unique perspective before walking in it yourself. I watched the parade the first couple of years I went to Dragon Con and then I've walked in the parade for many years. I'll be in the Disney section this year cosplaying as Snow White.

3) Selling Badges

Like I said above, I've been going to Dragon Con a long time. In the olden days, you could sell and transfer your badge if there was a reason you couldn't come. But that policy was ended many years ago - I did a quick google search and it looks like 2012 was when they became nontransferable.

But in the last week or so, I've seen several posts in Dragon Con groups asking how to sell a badge because said person could no longer attend for whatever reason. Most of the reasons seem to be because said person couldn't afford it.

I've heard there are some extreme circumstances where Dragon Con let a person move their membership to the next year, but that's like natural disaster stuff. Not "I can't afford it" stuff.

There was one tonight who really didn't like the "you can't" answer that people were giving her. She even brought up the fact that Dragon Con will let you have someone else pick up your badge if they have a note and copy of your id. But that's for like people who have a late flight and can't get to badge pickup while they are open. If you did that and the person just kept the badge, it's a clear violation of Dragon Con's rules.

Dragon Con has made it very clear that anyone caught buying or selling badges will get a lifetime ban to the con. Yeah, it sucks being out of that money, but I certainly wouldn't want to risk being banned for life. This was also why I went to Dragon Con last year a week and a half after I had surgery. 

It's very clear on the terms and conditions that Dragon Con memberships are nontransferable and nonrefundable. If you can't go, I'd email Dragon Con to see if anything can be done. But be prepared to just eat the cost of the badge. Skirting the rules doesn't seem worth it to me.

Beyond these specific things, remember to shower at least once a day, eat a few real meals a day, get some sleep, shower and use deodorant! Drink lots of water because it's hot in Atlanta in August / September. Always follow Wheaton's Law (Don't Be A Dick!) and remember there is no earthly way to see everything Dragon Con has to offer. But have fun!