Why I Love Social Media

Image: computerclipart.com

20 years ago, I first discovered the internet. It was 1996 and I was in my 2nd year of college. In those days, forums were the main way to communicate with lots of other people. I found a forum for Star Wars fans and suddenly I had all these like-minded friends.

While the internet has changed a great deal from those days, I still use it every day. In fact, most of my life is run by the internet. I work from home via the internet, I do all my banking and bill paying via the internet and of course, I use it to talk to my friends.

I have local friends but most of my close friends live far away from me. I'm an an introvert with chronic pain so there are days I don't leave the house. But I do long for human contact outside of my husband and child.

This is why I love social media. I can talk to my friends without having to leave my house. Some of my closest friends are people I've been friends with for years but have never met in person. A lot of my friends are also people I only see one a year at conventions that I talk to a lot over social media (mostly Facebook).

I never understand why people want to take breaks from Facebook. More power to them if that helps them out, but I could never do it. While Facebook isn't perfect, it works for what I use it for. I can message people directly, I can see what people are up to and I can talk with people who share the same interests in private groups.

A friend of mine is very ill. We are part of the same private group and most of the posts from this weekend were us worrying over lack of news. Praying and sending good thoughts and just huddling together via the internet as we worried and worried. I probably checked Facebook for updates every five minutes. Once we got an update, the relief was palpable. She still very ill but she's still with us.

Also after the shooting in Orlando, it was nice that my friends who live there were able to mark that they were ok. And of course, social media gives people a chance to mourn these awful tragedies together.

Social media isn't perfect, and I'd love to be able to get together with my friends in person. But until science finds a way to make transporters a thing, social media will have to do.

The Need To Be Right

Image: becominghiseve.wordpress.com 

I come from an unique generation. Having been born in the late 70's, I spent my childhood without the internet. But when I hit college, I 'found' the internet and have been a fan ever since. The internet is a great thing but it has led to some odd behavior in people.

Because you aren't taking to someone in front of you, trolls came about. But not just trolls, normal people feel the need to argue a point to death in order to prove that they are 'right'.

Admittedly in my many years on the internet, I've done that a time or two. But as I've grow older, I haven't seen the point. Most of the arguments end in an impasse because both sides feel the need to be right. And sometimes the need to be right can transform a normal person into a troll.

I'm on a lot of different Facebook groups for all my different interests. One is for Christians who are all geeks, Someone posted there how they had been arguing with an atheist about the existence of God.

This seemed completely pointless to me. We Christians can't prove that God exists, it's a belief we have. We've felt His Hand in our lives. An atheist hasn't felt that so they believe firmly that there is no God. It's not something that they could even have found a middle ground on.

I have lots of atheist friends as well as friends of other religions. Trying to prove that I'm right and they are wrong seems like a way to lose friends. Sadly the internet, for all it's good things, fosters the want in some people to browbeat them into believing what they want.

Later that evening, I posted the start of my newest cross stitch project in the cross stitch group I'm in. It is a kit that I've been wanting to do forever and a friend gifted it to me.

I started it at the tippy top of the fabric because I've had issues with kits and running out of room. So I wanted to make sure that I had enough fabric. This is also the most complicated chart that I've ever done, so I've been putting off starting because I was intimidated by it.

After stitching a little bit, I posted on my cross stitch group. Basically a 'Yay I started' and a picture. And then I got the 'advice' I didn't want. Several people told me that I was doing it "wrong".

I told them that I was doing it this way, and while I appreciated the advice, I was going to do it this way. Most of them stopped with the advice, but a couple didn't. One in particular was very fervent in proving how wrong I was. It got to the point that I had to get the group owner involved.

As it's my project, I do have the right to stitch it they way I want, but this person's need to be right pushed her over into troll territory. Even after the owner stepped in and posted for them to leave me be, she had to continue trolling.

It's a strange internet phenomenon because you wouldn't scream at a person in real life about how wrong they are. It does happen over the phone, but it wouldn't generally if you were calling someone you knew.

Being right is nice, I suppose, but I think more people need to realized that there are other ways to do things, and other opinions. In our diverse world today, there are many things that aren't just right or wrong.

Veggie Tales and the Change of DOOM!

Have you heard of Veggie Tales? Cute cartoons that use animated vegetables that tell Bible and other stories to spread the word of God. Well apparently Veggie Tales has done something completely and utterly unforgivable.

They changed the art style.

Yep, that's it but it has people on the Veggie Tales website demanding that they go back to the old style. Saying that the Veggies look creepy, that the makers of Veggies are sellouts and one guy said the Veggies look like rapist. Yes, seriously!

Things change. I don't mind the new look. Yes, it's different but it's not bad. As shown in the comment from Facebook, Emily doesn't mind either. She's a big fan of Veggie Tales and I know she'll enjoy the new Netflix series that is coming out soon.

What do you all think of the new Veggie Tales? Is their look that horrible? I wonder if I'm missing something because I don't get the rage.

BPAL and Me

Ten years ago today I did something that changed my life forever. I didn't know it was going to change my life, it was a simple thing that I did. Ten years ago today I joined the forums at bpal.org.

The BPAL forums are a fan run site for fan of Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab - a company that makes the most glorious perfume oils. I had never been a perfume wearer until a few weeks before I joined the forum. But the perfume oils didn't smell like anything else I had every smelled before with perfume. I was hooked right away.

Back in those days, forums were one of the most popular ways to chat with people online. Facebook was still in it's infancy, Twitter didn't exist yet and while there was still MySpace and Livejournal, forums were there too for individual topics. These days, the BPAL forum is the only one I visit on a regular basis. Most of my other interaction is via Facebook groups.

Now you may be wondering how a fan run forum could change my life. It wasn't the forum, per say, it was and is the people there. The people on the forum are awesome and kind and honestly my best friends. Not 15,000 of them, but a few.

The forum-ites have been there for me when I was getting married, when I was pregnant, on my low days and on my good days. I've met a few in person, at meet and sniffs and Dragon Con, but most of my dear BPAL friends I've never met outside of cyberspace.

One of those friends is actually the owner and genius behind Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab - Beth.

Beth, me and Emily at Dragon Con 2012

She's been a member of the forum since I joined and it's been great getting to know her through the years. I got to meet her in person at Dragon Con a few years ago and I see her every year there now. She is a wonderful person and her creations are wonderful.

I feel another bond with Beth because our daughters are about the same age. I get to see her daughter through Beth's Facebook posts and I'd love if Emily and Lilith were able to meet someday.

My collection of the actual perfume has gotten smaller over the years. My body has turned against it - whenever I put any on my skin, it morphs into an awful floral and gives me a migraine. I have to use solely scent lockets now because my skin hates me. But Emily has her own small collection of smellies - she loves putting it on, though she kind of over does it because she's five.

This summer the forum went down for several months and it was hard on all of us. There are several BPAL Facebook groups, but it wasn't the same. Someone actually created a temporary, bare bones forum for the interim, but it wasn't the same either. Once the actual forum reopened, it was like coming home.

That action I did ten years ago today was a simple one but it really changed my life. I'm so thankful for all the great friends I've made. Here's to another ten years!