The Med Merry Go Round

Merry go rounds were more fun as a kid

I've never done drugs of the illegal variety. A boyfriend in college wanted me to try pot - in part to see how loopy I'd get. But that never happened. The main reason I've never done illegal drugs is because the legal ones mess me up so badly.

I have a lot of drug allergies. Lots of hives and other bad reactions. I basically missed Spring Break my senior year because of being on the med merry go round and I just had something easy - the flu I think. I was woozy and really out of it because they kept changing the medicine they were treating me with.

When I was in college, I ended up in the hospital. I was home from Christmas break and it was that time of the month. I also had an upset stomach. So my mom gave me ibuprofen and Pepto Bismal. I broke out in hives from head to toe. I was so swollen that I had to wear slippers to the doctor's. He took one look at me and sent me to the hospital.

This was all before my chronic pain started. I was on the med merry go round for nine months at the beginning of my chronic headaches. In the end, nothing worked and I just found home remedies to help me.

But with the seizures, I can't not be on medicine. The first medicine that they gave me in the hospital was given to me because it was the only anti-seizure medicine that comes in IV form. But it's been making me feel really tired. So my neurologist put me on a new medicine, but I have to be on both for a bit to wean off the first stuff.

I really, really don't want to have anymore seizures so I willingly got back up on the med merry go round. And I feel like I'm on a literal merry go round. The first day I took it, I was so woozy I couldn't walk straight but my brain was really fogged up as well. I would try to talk or type and it wouldn't come out right.

That's gotten better but I'm still lurching around the house like a drunken pirate. I have a little under a week until I'm weaned off the first medicine. I hope and pray that it will make me less tired so I can get off the med merry go round.

All I want is to get back to some form of normal. I still have pain, but I'm used to that.