The Med Merry Go Round

Merry go rounds were more fun as a kid

I've never done drugs of the illegal variety. A boyfriend in college wanted me to try pot - in part to see how loopy I'd get. But that never happened. The main reason I've never done illegal drugs is because the legal ones mess me up so badly.

I have a lot of drug allergies. Lots of hives and other bad reactions. I basically missed Spring Break my senior year because of being on the med merry go round and I just had something easy - the flu I think. I was woozy and really out of it because they kept changing the medicine they were treating me with.

When I was in college, I ended up in the hospital. I was home from Christmas break and it was that time of the month. I also had an upset stomach. So my mom gave me ibuprofen and Pepto Bismal. I broke out in hives from head to toe. I was so swollen that I had to wear slippers to the doctor's. He took one look at me and sent me to the hospital.

This was all before my chronic pain started. I was on the med merry go round for nine months at the beginning of my chronic headaches. In the end, nothing worked and I just found home remedies to help me.

But with the seizures, I can't not be on medicine. The first medicine that they gave me in the hospital was given to me because it was the only anti-seizure medicine that comes in IV form. But it's been making me feel really tired. So my neurologist put me on a new medicine, but I have to be on both for a bit to wean off the first stuff.

I really, really don't want to have anymore seizures so I willingly got back up on the med merry go round. And I feel like I'm on a literal merry go round. The first day I took it, I was so woozy I couldn't walk straight but my brain was really fogged up as well. I would try to talk or type and it wouldn't come out right.

That's gotten better but I'm still lurching around the house like a drunken pirate. I have a little under a week until I'm weaned off the first medicine. I hope and pray that it will make me less tired so I can get off the med merry go round.

All I want is to get back to some form of normal. I still have pain, but I'm used to that.

A Day in The Life With Chronic Migraines

Image: http://migraine.com/

June is National Migraine Awareness Month and I'm hoping to do several posts to promote awareness. First up is how my chronic migraines can really screw with my life.

I have daily chronic headaches that get migraine bad. And when I say migraine bad, I'm not just taking about higher pain levels. I get auras and nausea, my brain gets fuzzy as does my vision. I get the whole migraine package.

This particular migraine started on Saturday after Wizard World. I slept poorly Saturday night and was feeling worse on Sunday. We drove home on Sunday and I went right to bed.

Monday I still felt bad but I felt well enough to work. I worked my shift and went back to bed. I rested all day. But I went into the living room after I put Emily to bed. There were voices outside my door which I knew someone was in my car port. I went and peeked out my windows and there was a man and woman walking down my driveway. I'm not sure why they thought it would be fun to trespass on my property, but it gave me a small panic attack.

I still rested the rest of the evening and got to sleep early. I slept like a rock but Todd said that I kept making weird noises in the night. I didn't wake up at all during the night which is odd for me

Now we get to the day in the life part. I woke up yesterday feeling like a train had hit me. I stumbled out of bed and went to my computer. Everything was blurry to the point that I had to touch my face to make sure I had put my glasses on. I knew I couldn't work like that so I emailed in sick.

I am very lucky because whenever I get sick my boss just moves my hours to my day off which is Sunday. I was a kind wife and I let Todd sleep in. I went into the living room with Emily and we watched all the Sailor Moon episodes that were up on Hulu.

During the last episode, Todd got up so I headed back to bed. I turned on Netflix and Charmed. I was sick enough that I couldn't do anything else - I tend to be a multitasker so my hands are using busy with cross stitching and other things. But the pain was bad enough that all I could do was lay there and watch tv in a dark room.

Finally my body decided that it was time to sleep. I was having a hard time keeping my eyes open. It was nearly time for Todd to go to work, so I had Emily come in the bedroom. She amused herself with our iPad while I cat napped for a bit. I felt better when I woke up. Enough that I could make supper and hang out with Emily.

I got Emily to bed and I went back to bed myself. Watched a little more tv and cross stitched a little more. Then I went to sleep.

Today I still am suffering from the same migraine but it's a little better so I'm working. Yesterday was not a typical day in my life, thankfully, but it happens thanks to my chronic migraines. Thankfully I have a good job and a good boss, an understanding husband and a great kid. But just a small thing like people walking up my driveway can give me a panic attack which can lead to higher pain levels.

My life is a game of Russian roulette. I don't get shot but I do get bowled over with the pain sometimes. I try to be as normal as I can but I'm not normal. I'm a chronic migraine sufferer.

Literal...

Image: http://charlotteheadachecenter.com/

As I've mentioned before, I suffer from daily chronic headaches. They get migraine bad often, and I'm not just talking about higher pain levels. I get auras that give me vision problems, I have a hard time thinking clearly and I tend to take things very literally.

It took me a while to realize I was being so literal. I did it this morning without thinking about it at work, but I did realize after a moment that the person I was talking to was being sarcastic. It's a very interesting side effect to my migraines.

When my pain levels go up, I feel my intelligence slipping down. I can't brain today is a fact of life for me some days. I think because of the intense pain, my higher brain functions will short out a bit.

So if I take something you say either in person or online literally, it's probably because my brain isn't working correctly.