The Pandemic Diaries - On Being Essential

Me, an essential 

I work at a grocery store in the deli. I serve food and make subs. It's not hard not is it glamorous. But it allowed me to quit a job that was sucking my soul away and I've made a lot of great friends.

But in this time of Covid-19, it's less great. For the most part my job is the same. We are just washing our hands and changing our gloves a ton more. And cleaning as often as we can. 

Today everyone was given papers to put in our cars deeming us "essential". In light of so many people being laid off or just plain losing their jobs, essential might seem great. But it's not.

Every time I go to work, it feels like I'm playing Russian roulette. Chances are if (when?) I get the coronavirus, I'll survive. I do have health issues but none are breathing related. But it sounds horrible to have so I don't want to get it. And I certainly don't want to spread it.

I worry about me, my family, my friends and coworkers. It also worries me how busy we continue to be. Lunch rush today was insane with crowds of people coming to the deli for food. So much for social distancing.

But as a grocery store, we are essential. People need food throughout this so I will continue to go to work and do the best job I can. 

The anxiety about going into work today made me physically sick last night. My pain levels have been much higher. Though I am thankful that, for the most part, our customers have been kind.

If you know someone who is an essential worker, please keep us in your thoughts. Doctors, nurses and other hospital workers are on the front lines, caring for those who are ill. The rest of us are trying to keep people fed and supplied. We are open, we have things and we'll continue on throughout this ordeal.